Happy Mind, Happy Life

Happy Mind, Happy Life: 10 Simple Ways to Feel Great Every Day. A science-backed guide to a calmer, happier you.

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How To Let Go, Move On And Leave Your Past In Your Past with Julia Samuel

by Dr. Rangan Chatterjee   /  March 16, 2022

Why does family matter so much to us? As today’s guest, renowned psychotherapist Julia Samuel explains, every client she’s seen in 30 years of practice, mentions their family members. Like it or not, we all carry our upbringing into our adult lives. Our family is wired in us genetically and it shows in our responses to life, our beliefs, and the ‘fault lines’ that trigger us in daily life. Could finding out more about our families be the key to knowing more about ourselves?

Julia’s new book, Every Family Has A Story: How We Inherit Love and Loss is a powerful exploration of what we inherit, what we can change, and how inter-family relationships inform all aspects of our lives. Often unknowingly, we are a product of how our older relatives have coped with their experiences. It even shows up in our genes! Julia and I explore this subject of transgenerational trauma – or how our present-day struggles probably didn’t start with us (but learning and forgiveness can).

In order to protect our children and grandchildren, Julia says, we need to process our feelings so we don’t pass them on. This might mean uncovering the secrets and untold stories from generations above you. And if that sounds daunting to put into practice, she has some wonderful advice for facilitating difficult conversations. We also discuss generational conflicts over parenting techniques, setting boundaries, and how to be compassionate and respectful with family members while also recognising and protecting your own needs.

Whatever your family situation – whether you’re close, estranged or somewhere in between – there’s something we can all take from Julia’s powerful, original approach.

Caution: contains mild swearing.

Disclaimer: The content in the podcast and on this webpage is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.*

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Watch the video version of this interview – click below.

'You cannot fix what you don't face.' Click To Tweet

Connect with Julia:

Website     Instagram     Facebook

Julia’s Books:

Every Family Has A Story: How We Inherit Love and Loss

This Too Shall Pass: Stories of Change, Crisis and Hopeful Beginnings

Grief Works: Stories of Life, Death and Surviving

Dr Chatterjee’s resources:

#123 The Power of Pain with Julia Samuel

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*DISCLAIMER: Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.

†Disclosure: All books marked with a † are hyperlinked to an affiliate program. We take part in Amazon’s affiliate advertising program designed to provide a way for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon’s website. You are not charged any extra by using these links to purchase books.

Dr. Rangan Chatterjee MbChB, BSc (Hons), MRCP, MRCGP