Is love something that happens magically between two people – or is it something that needs to be nurtured? Does it come from within us, or is it something we’re given?

My guest today is here to help us figure out these answers and more. Jay Shetty is a former monk who wanted to share his learnings with a wider audience. He’s now one of the world’s most influential, modern self-help gurus – with a social media following in the tens of millions. He’s also a bestselling author, host of the podcast On Purpose, and Chief Purpose Officer for the meditation app Calm.

I first welcomed Jay to the podcast in 2020 and he’s now back to share his wisdom on purpose and relationships to celebrate the launch of his new book, 8 Rules Of Love: How To Find It, Keep It, And Let It Go, and his world tour to support the book, which hits the UK in May.

We begin our conversation talking about the importance of purpose and how we can go about finding or refining our own. Jay also shares his morning routine which includes thankfulness, intention, meditation and exercise and explains how this helps him to live each day with more purpose. We then go on to talk about relationships and discuss the idea that solitude and self-knowledge are the foundations of love.

We talk about the fact that challenges in a relationship are more often issues within ourselves; how we often take our stresses out on those closest to us – and how we can stop doing this. Jay explains why difficulties arise when we communicate what we want from a partner, but not why we want it, the satisfaction that comes with mutual growth, the importance of finding a partner who shares your values and how the qualities you attract in others, will be the same ones you use to impress them.

Whether you’re someone who is looking for love, happily single, recently separated, in a new relationship, or you’ve been with someone for many years, you’ll find nuggets of wisdom throughout this deep and raw conversation. I hope you enjoy listening.

Watch the video version of this interview – click below.